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  • dennisganahl

Giving it my best

Horse Sense

New Year’s Resolutions

Let’s start the year by resolving to be honest with each other. Most people don’t want to change much about their lives. We’re mostly happy and content except when our French fries are served cold. Why do we need to change who we are?

It’s always the overachiever who walks around wearing colorful athletic tights drinking chia mint-flavored mineral water telling us about a “NEW” weight loss program.

I like me, and I enjoy life. Sure, I’d like to lose the couple pounds I gained last year, but not enough to give up an occasional strip of extra-thick hickory smoked crisp bacon. If bacon isn’t healthy, why do they serve it on a salad?

When someone asks me if I’m going to lose weight this year, with a straight face, I say, “Absolutely. I’m going to lose at least 260 pounds this year.” I’ve lost at least 260 pounds every year for the past 30 years. By the way, a baby African elephant weighs 260 pounds. Over 30 years, that’s 7,800 pounds, or almost four tons, which is how much a mature female African Savana elephant weighs.

My diet fits my lifestyle: every weekend I eat and drink too much, and gain five pounds unless it’s Super Bowl weekend. Then, I gain more. First thing Monday morning my diet kicks in and I lose the five pounds by Friday--I'm ready for the weekend. Oh, and my diet plan doesn’t include chia mint-flavored mineral water.

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